I’m not sure if everyone gets the February blahs or if it’s more centered in areas of horrid gray weather like, oh, NJ. Last year I went on a cruise which helped immeasurably; this year, I’m longing for beaches but dealing with situations such as losing out on a promotion because of my “flexible schedule” (read: working 90 hours a week isn’t enough) and semi-permanent house guests who are job hunting-helpful with the kids, don’t get me wrong, in between job hunting, but fairly stressed because of…job hunting.

A friend at work came in the other day with gorgeous new blonde hair…I’d love such a change but I haven’t even dragged myself to update the highlights, lately, which I usually do when I look at my hair and say “Oh God, it looks awful”. Which I DID do, about two months ago! Imagine the worst.

So here’s the latest in what I’m doing to make myself feel better. One, trying not to work all hours-last year, I was working every night on the Detours&OnRamps Forum until like midnight, after a day of working and kid-taking-care-of. I’m trying to give myself more of a break and relax after kids are in bed by watching tv. Enter the writers’ strike, and it’s that much harder, but I’ve prevailed by revisiting Survivor fandom, and including shows like Las Vegas in my repetoire. I believe I’ve blogged about Las Vegas before, the most embarassing show it is possible to watch and like-but on the upside, as far as I can tell there aren’t any writers for it so it hasn’t been affected by the strike. It is so preposterous and out there that I can one thousand percent escape reality when I watch it. However, I found myself last night TEARING UP over the story line!! (Give me a bit of a break; it was the season finale). Also finding myself wanting some of that “Las Vegas” lifestyle–parenting in high heels, gorgeous clothes and flashy jewelry…yikes.

SO I was then watching Jon and Kate plus 8 which inevitably makes me feel better. Because the madness of their lives with eight kids is similar to mine though I only have 3–but I make myself feel better thinking how they have producers and the like to help them and I have only me. I love that show because as crazy as their lives are and as crazy as it is to have SIX three year olds–they so, so love them. That is nice and reminds me how much I love my own. And reminds me I should maybe not yell so much even during the twins’ all night “No Sleep Till Brooklyn” Dance party.

And then, today, what could have been the worst of all feel BAD experiences brightened my day a bit. I was given the distinct honor, the privilege, of spending 6 hours in “Defensive Driving School”. Long, long ago in my wild 20’s I got two speeding tickets and went to driving school then. I forgot all about this but was reminded by a friend who recalled me coming home with super-duper safety trips like “Consider wearing a helmet when driving a car…it might help in a crash”. I have since had a very safe driving record unmarred by tickets of any sort–also conspicuously absent any headgear. And then the other day, I was coming out of a shopping center and my charming and well mannered 4 year old was screaming her head off because I had denied her a bagel. (This was because, if you want to know, she’d been acting nuts at TJ MAXX and then when I said not to, she said “I LOVE TO BE BAD”). So I was coming out in one of those lanes that you have to go right to merge onto the road and I stopped, looked, saw no cars near, went, and got pulled over by a policeman who said I didn’t come to a complete stop. He was unmoved by the STILL yelling 4 year old or by my blemish free driving record and gave me a ticket.

A lawyer friend said “Pay the ticket and just go to driving school because that will reduce the 2 points AND hey, you’ll even save on insurance!”. So I signed up and got to spend 6 delightful hours today getting tips and ideas on better driving. The first tip I got was that your insurance company won’t raise your rates for 2 points and those 2 points would disappear in a year, thus my $65 and 6 hours…well spent? Maybe no. BUT, maybe if you consider my feelings of elitism and superiority having emerged from a day spent with NJ drivers–perhaps not the shiniest apples in the bunch–who all had upwards of 12 points and were (from the way they peeled out of the parking lot post-class) quickly heading for more. I literally felt like “OH MY GOD. I must be one of the smartest people in the WORLD if this is my competition”. Of course none of them were there for only 2 points, so does that make me the stupid one? I’m choosing not to think that way.

Lesson learned: if you’re not getting fulfillment from your career, try somewhere else. Find your “feeling brilliant” place. And remember…there’s always Las Vegas.

While I am no doubt deluding myself in thinking my blog is being read far and wide, I did (as frequent readers may recall) encourage my friends and relations to keep up with me through blog reading…some of them are in VA. And since a Detours&OnRamps forum is in the works for the DC area, I thought it wise to reach out and start putting some pieces together…

And had a GREAT conversation with Whitney, from Mom-entum Resources, the other day. It was encouraging both personally and professionally. Mom-entum started in Richmond, and is focused on bringing quality part-time (or, not full-time) jobs to moms who want to work, at a level at or close to where they were–or at least using skills they’ve developed–while continuing to be able to spend some time with children. What was so encouraging was that Whitney said that a lot of companies that they are talking to are quite amenable to these types of arrangements as (gasp) they find it works for them, works for moms. They aren’t spending as much and still getting quality candidates to perform the work–moms are getting great opportunities but not having to sacrifice every moment with their children. These are the companies that are making a difference and our goal is to bring some of them to speak at our DC event–details of which will be available and published soon.

The other nice thing about talking to Whitney is something I find over and over in working on this event–there are so many great, smart mothers out there with great, smart ideas who are so eager to work to make things better. I guess that’s part of the premise of that new “Lipstick Jungle” show’–that busy women need supportive friends–I am guessing because the ads themselves make me so crazy that I refuse to watch it and start yelling about it every time I see an ad. Anyway, the opportunity to meet with and talk to people like Whitney is what’s so great, and what made that first October event really amazing…

So stay tuned for conference dates and locales soon, and certainly check out Mom-entum if you’re in the VA area!

I am a firm advocate of anything that helps make it better for working mothers or (as I think of myself) mothers who work. But yesterday on the Today show they were talking about bringing babies to work. I told my kids “Come see the story about watching babies go to work”. My four year old pointed out “Wait a minute. Babies can’t drive cars”. True, but even beyond that I am not sure I’m behind this one.

As an aside, when directed to come see the story about babies at work, one twin said “Barack Obama”. Why? Because she is MAD, MAD for Barack Obama. Yesterday she said “I love Barack Obama, but I love Elmo”. Like she had been engaged in a soul-searching over who she should love most. The answer to many if not all questions is “Barack Obama” (in this, she is similar it seems to most of America…relentless optimism, hope for “change”–though her trigger points probably lie closer to a no-nap policy then any big ideas of universal healthcare). We’re pretty Republican, so we’re not sure if she’s forging her own path, trying to “push our buttons” as the four year old says, or just really likes the B-man.

Anyway, I did a google search and it seems that there are companies out there doing this, and confining it to the babies’ first nine months–certainly a bit more reasonable as there’s a lot of sleeping going on (in theory) during that time. Still, it’s pretty disruptive. I personally have anecdotal evidence from THIS VERY DAY when I bribed my three “impish delights” (I think that’s how I’ll refer to them, en masse, from here on out…based on my last posting of their general naughtiness, yet delightfulness)…I bribed ‘em so I could treat myself to a fulfilling, rewarding conference call from work by putting them in front of Bob the Builder and WOULDN’T you know it it ended just as I had to say my 1 minute piece, thus I was blabbering about marketing while they were bawling about Bob from outside the office door. Awesome.

In an office, there arguably wouldn’t be the trauma of Bob ending, but what WOULD there be? Staplers? Computers? I mean, I guess mine all are over the “bring the baby to work” cutoff, but I still think what with technology today doesn’t it just make sense to let employees work a fair share of their schedule from home, where they and their baby can be happily engaged?

Still, at least it’s nice to see companies doing what they can to recognize that women want to stay productive.