I know this for a fact because of the helpful advice given to me by the woman at the park when I had my girls out the other day in 60′s (well maybe high 50′s) weather.
The preface here is that my 4 year old is a hater of all things coat-like. And she’s always hot. That’s like me; I don’t sleep with blankets because I’m always hot and she’s the same way. So she was at the park in a dress and tights (and of course a tiara but that goes unsaid. She takes baths in a tiara. When I kiss her at night when she’s gone to sleep she’s always found the tiara and put it on FOR SLEEP. Blankets no. Tiara yes).
So she was coatless and this woman came up to me to say “Are you the mother?”
“Yes” say I.
“Don’t you think your daughter should be better dressed than she is?”(um, how do you GET better dressed at the playground then wearing a tiara? Must she go white-tie?)
But NO, this super helpful woman needed to tell me my business about how my kids should be covered.
I said, “Well, she doesn’t want to wear a coat. And I’m her mother”. Then one of the twins said (as she does about everyone–tv, crowd, restaurants–”Who dat?” And I said “A busybody”. Which my own mother yelled at me for as if I’m the rude person in this scenario.
Let me tell you something. I KNOW I’m a bad mother. Tonight my 3 girls came with us to dinner and wore:
Child A, 4: A dress (normal) and velvet cape (not normal) and of course tiara.
Twin B, 2 1/2: A dress, some sort of geriatric sandals like an 89 year old guy would be sporting on the streets of Miami, and a poncho. Hood up of course.
Twin C: 2 1/2: A tutu. With tights. And a sticker. Taped to her with scotch tape because it lost its sticker-ness.
So clearly I’m a bad mother because they weren’t dressed in matching outfits (not matching to each other, matching their own pieces!). My husband was quick to point this out and walked about 20 feet ahead of us because of the embarrassment issues. Mind you I was just happy that twin C wasn’t wearing her go-to uniform: flowered pants and NOT matching, totally different colored flowered shirt. She finds it in the wash. She finds it under the beds. She wears it EVERY DAY.
I’m also a bad mother it seems because in the flurry of putting together the May event I’ve needed some time here and there. So instead of bundling the girls up and lugging them on walks or convincing them to take another stab at their toys which they are SO over (it’s March after all, long cold winter) I let them watch Mary Poppins–with which they are obsessed–two days in a row.
And listen to the cd 48 times.
At least.
But how bad am I REALLY? They are singing their hearts out (marching around the family room chanting about votes for women). They’re perfectly self confident in whatever they wear. And as I reminded myself the other day, they could be watching far worse. Mary Poppins is, after all, a NANNY! I mean, it’s her GIG!
So lady at the park: you don’t need to tell me I’m a bad mother. I am certainly hard on myself enough. But when you do I can justify all my decisions…so at the end of the day, at least I’ve convinced myself that I’m good!Though no Mary Poppins.
