I find myself of late getting angry at–and loving–the same behavior in my children. I’m not talking about loving the kid but getting frustrated with them talking back or something (I just had to have a heart-to-heart with my five year old who dramatically asked why we didn’t love her when she got sent to bed without a book. I explained we loved her but didn’t love her talking back and not cleaning up. I think in reality the whole thing was a ploy to stay up later).
I’m talking about, though, simultaneously being angry at a 3 year old twin because she wasn’t taking her nap – instead, she was wandering around her room putting on her batgirl costume. 30 minutes later I went to wake her up and how could I be angry at a person sleeping so peacefully in full bat-gear (boots and plastic mask included)?
I’m talking about being mad that I can’t do 5 minutes of work without my five year old reading over my shoulder (she has always got to be TOUCHING me!) and yet still, at the same time, loving that she always wants to be close to me. Being annoyed that they are running around the house and not getting in the bath – then having to laugh at the spectacle of a skinny little twin doing naked cheerleading jumping jacks for the joy of dancing.
It reminds me of when one of my college aged cousins had not studied for an exam and thereby forced the entire family to cancel a planned weekend away – my uncle was SO angry. This came on the heels of a conversation with my mom about when will I get to the point that I don’t look at my kids and love them so fiercely I could squeeze them to pieces, love them so much it makes me cry? She thought for a second and said perhaps my uncle did NOT feel that way about my cousin. But that all that cute time of Batgirl naps, jumping twins, and “Close to You” puts love in the bank, I guess.
